Sume terribul fings have been happening around here.
A cuple ob weeks ago my dog pen was invaded by da aliens. I did not know what dey was at first, but I did consult da interwebs and discover dey is aliens. I has a Checklist Fur Aliens and dey does meet da criteria.
1) Dey came owt ob da grownd.
Tick! Dey most trooly did.
Here I is checking da grownd fur suspicious alien diggings.
Here does be sume ob der holes. In case woo not believe me. ‘Parently dey been down der many many years. Just waiting. Fery suspicious.
2) Dey splits open der skin and changes into anofur shape.
Tick! Dey fur sure does dis one. Dat what alerted us to dem. We did find lots & lots & lots ob da left over skins on fings in my pen.
Dis be an example.
3) Dey be abowt da ugliest fing what efur woo did see.
Tick! Seeing as it was dark time when dey came owt (which does be anofur suspicious behaviours) we doesn’t haf da photo ob owr own. But we did recognise dem on da internets.
Owr aliens was just like dis one.
So, I finks woo will all agrees wif my evidences dat we haf been struck by an alien invasion.
In MY dog pen.
UNbelievable.
Da mum swears dey is sume kind ob fing called cicadas.
But I doesn’t fink her haf consulted my Checklist.
In ofur nooos, we haf had a different kind ob invasion too. Der be no disagreements abowt dis one however. It does be a FLEA. I is horrified. Dat Izzy done taxi services fur a flea and bringed it to OWR house. Sheesh. Woo may fink her is sweet & innocent. But we knows different now.
Der was just da one. Well da one what we saw anyways. But da mum went a little crazeeeeee. In my opawnion.
She still muttering sumefing abowt ‘How come, when we only have two dogs, I had to wash & clean five dog beds, two comfy chairs & eleventy million blankies?’ Well, I doesn’t be dat sure she exactly said eleventy million, but was sume real big number more den I haf paws to count up anyways.
All I knows is I haf to haf yuck smelly treatment on my furs and sleeps on da cold hard kitchen floor fur most a whole day while owr stuffs dried in da sunshines. So I sure hope dat nefur happens again. *Glares at Izzy*
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